This particular culinary masterpiece looks and smells good in the flesh even though the picture isn't that appetising. Behold, the ommburger! Yes ladies and gentlemen, I have successfully combined the wonders of two butcher-made burgers with your everyday eggy favourite, the omelette.

I need to be careful, I have already caught wind of foreign secret services attempting to purloin my classified recipe; with this ommburger we must tread carefully my friends.

So maybe I overdid the whole burger-omelette story somewhat, but the only other story of the day is that with the blowing gales, an ariel is loose on a building and a barrier has been put up around the walkway; right in my daily path. I agree that this isn't entirely health and safety gone mad, the gable seems to be collapsing too and I don't particularly want a brick falling on my head, but as I walked on the grass around the sides I slipped and nearly broke my neck. It's irony at work isn't it?